You'll have to answer eventually.

Who are you?

Many people answer this question with a list of useless syllables. "Jonathan Ebejer," for example. That is by no means who I am. It is what people call me (unless they use a nickname) but in no way is it who I am.

Who are you? More importantly, how do you go about answering that question? Unfortunately we tend to look to the world around us to find out who we are. We place ourselves in certain groups, certain beliefs, and label all kind of -ists to ourselves.

Such an obsession on looking at the world around us to define ourselves is like measuring the shape of each and every other puzzle piece except the one we're interested in. Then we hope to guess how this one puzzle piece fits in with the rest.

Needless to say, trying to find out who we are in such a way can never prove to be effective. Sometimes it might completely misguide us and take us to places or situations which are not where we belong. After a certain amount of time we begin to feel out of place, maybe even alone and depressed...which is to be expected as eventually you will realise you are not where you're meant to be.

The most effective way of finding out who you are is, unsurprisingly, observing yourself. The imagination is key here, as it will show you who you wish to be. That image of who you want to be is much more real than you may think....if you want to be something it is a clear sign that deep down inside that something is part of who you really are. Now I'm not talking about wanting a car or something pathetic like that. I'm talking about character.

I call wanting a car "pathetic" mostly because material objects like that are more often than not there to try to down out who we really are and just become what we own. Think about it. Imagine somebody came into the room right now and asked you to describe yourself. You wouldn't begin with your personality. You'd begin with your job, your school, your family....everything in your life which isn't you. Then maybe you'd get to describing your personality....if you even remember that it's there to be described. I'm sure you can remember an occasion you were asked to describe yourself and didn't have much to say. As you stood there grasping for thoughts, the only things which didn't pass your mind were your own virtues, weren't they?

And why do we all have embarrassing moments, but still feel ashamed when we look like fools? Isn't it to hide from who you are? To hide from your clumsiness, forgetfulness, inadequacy etc.? You want to look strong don't you? You want to seem in control- to seem like everything's in your hands. How much of your life is really in your hands? Very shockingly little. But we don't want to admit that. Everyone's a king, nobody's a fool.

I have no idea why we have these self-destructive tendencies. Maybe it's instinct, maybe we're brought up that way. Maybe it's the media or the government or the educational system. I don't know. And I won't pretend to know.

So with all this in mind, let's try again;

Who are you?